I'm not a religious man, but after this first week of excellence I might need to do some serious soul-searching. I'm pretty sure god came to me in my dreams one night and the only thing I can remember is his beautiful flowing red locks of hair... The Tigers are 5-1 right now, at this rate we are only on pace for a 135 win season. Settling for just 135 wins is a loser’s mentality. Yes, that would break the MLB record for all-time wins, but I'm planning on us breaking many MLB records this year. I don't want us to put up just good #'s....I want the Tigers to put up videogame numbers. Videogame numbers are a magical type of achievement. In the video game universe, it is not out of the realm of possibility to hit 100 Hr's in a season, win 150 games, and have a starting pitcher go undefeated throughout the season. For example, I just hooked up my super nintendo and started a season with the 1994 The other night the Tigers hit 6 Hr's off of some fool named R.A. Dickey in 4 innings. I'm pretty sure the R.A. stands for wRetchedly Assy. I know, that wasn't fair, but the 'w' is silent, so that’s just not fair in itself. I know the Royals and Rangers aren’t exactly known as baseball squadrons to fear, but going 5-1 isn’t anything to sneeze at. Also, every time we beat texas in anything, it somehow makes me feel like my political stance is validated. When the spurs beat the pistons last year, I was almost ready to concede that the Iraq War was fought on just means, and that the no-child left behind act literally left no child behind. Needless to say, it is pretty fucking wild what a Robert horry jump shot can do to your mental psyche.
Anyways, going in the game earlier today against Texass, Jesus Chris superstar was leading the
2 comments:
"Henry Rowengartneresque". i had to comment. Throw from the half two (i believe it is) and the Tiger's pitchers will be unstoppable. Also...i too am looking forward to flag day. baha.
(you have an angel with you right now)
loyal reader #2354
furthering the ANALogy, only Jesus Chris Superstar's own ego can play the role of the jews in this ongoing epic. so far he seems very humbled, not a likely candidate to be a victim of his own success. a characteristic i think was derived from Archie during ginger kids training camp. brady if you were as passionate about say cigarettes as you are the tigers youd be long since dead, and im proud of that. not to harp on details but when you say "...Henry Rowengartneresque when he puts down those dillholes..." do you mean actual putdowns? ie. pitchers got a big butt, what's the matter are ya chicken? bawk bawk, etc. OR do you mean puts them down using the fastball? or are you referring to the floater? or are you just suggesting that bonderman will peel back the label of his glove revealing that his mother's genetics are what got him on the slab in this critical game? Be more specific man... your readers need you!
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