Tigers Ready to Make It Rain On Florida Southern

Tigers have a game tomorrow. No, really. Florida Southern travels to the madhouse that is Joker Marchant Stadium for a crucial early season battle. The Tigers are starting Virgil Vasquez. I really can't tell you much about him, but his name is Virgil, so he's already a couple steps ahead of all of us. We have 7 pitchers scheduled to bring that hot fire tomorrow, most notably Kyle Sleeth and Jair Jurrjens. Sleeth has had a bum arm since being drafted in the 1st round a couple years ago, but supposively has looked good so far in spring.

My favorite thing about spring training is the articles that come out. The vast majority of these articles are these super optimistic fluff pieces that make you think it's impossible for your team to win anything less then 140 games in the upcoming year. If you remember, last year at this time we were bombarded with constant articles proclaiming meathook's new svelt and magnifique physique. Then, he was in rehab.

This year we are treated to Granderson correcting his strikeout issues, Sheffield becoming insta-bff's with the entire organization and my favorite, Bonderman developing a change up. These articles get me all hot and bothered. They are sexy as hell but do not mean a thing until april 2nd. After taking a cold shower and coming to grips, it's best to realize that when there are no games going on, nothing of any consequence is going on.

In some depressing news, "Go Get em' Tigers" will be no more. Apparently the Tigers team felt the song was a downer and ruined their high after winning a big game. So, I feel it is this blogs duty to find a replacement. First song that immediately came to my mind was Wreckxs n effects epic "Rumpshaker." After Neifi hits the walkoff HR, I'd love to see a group of hunnies take the field with saxophones of course and seranade the victorious Tigers properly. I'm open to other suggestions though.

34 days until opening day

Hallelujah Hollaback! Pitchers and Catchers Report

First off, I'd like to apologize to my loyal readers. I've been really busy these past couple of weeks with video games and tv thus not allowing me to update as frequently as I should. Readers, I think you are comcastic. I really do.

Just like today is a made up holiday, so is tomorrow. Tomorrow pitchers and catchers report. I need to let that sink in a little bit. I'm getting a little verklempt over here imagining that this bastard season of winter might finally be coming to an end. If you have actually been reading other articles about the Tigers and not just mine, then shame on you. But, then you'd know that much of the team has been in Lakeland for weeks preparing dilligently for that Southern Florida slaughter.

There's been a nasty rumor going around that the Tigers are in the running for Juan Gonzalez. It's not happening, no way. I'm convinced it's not going to happen because i so much want it to not happen and that should be good enough. If anyone brings it up around me again, be prepared for a man-slap to the face. It's that serious. Also, it sounds like dmitri young is going to take himself and hopefully the Ying Yang Twins whisper song to the Nationals to cause 30,000 people to feel awkward.

With Tiger spring training sort of kicking off tomorrow, I’ve been preparing by listening to healthy dosage of jock jams and bench pressing anything resembles something that might be heavy. Really, nothing really notable has happened in the past couple of weeks, but that will likely change soon. So, just twiddle your thumbs in anticipation until then.

The baseball gods will be here soon enough to rescue us all.

46 days until opening day