Friday, November 09, 2007

Obscure Ex-Tiger of the Day, 11-9

(He had atleast one error this day)

Neifi Perez.

I fully expect the term "Neifi'd" to take the place of "Munsoned." If you look up "professional swinging bunt douchebag drug attic bag of farts" in your websters dictionary, you'll probably see the picture from above. Never did I ever think that we would look back at the John McDonald era so fondly.

Lot's of bad things have happened in over 100 years of Detroit baseball. But the shitcloud #8 subjected to us might top everything. Neifi played 55 terrible games in Detroit. In his unprecedented run to league LVP he hit below .200, had a grand total of 4 doubles, hit one HR, got suspended twice and killed 6 babies. The Royals did get Neifi'd this year when he hit a HR and had 4 Rbi's in a blow out victory. This upset dwarfed App. St. over Michigan. Sadly, that win over the Royals should probably have an asterisks by it now.

On October 30, the year of our lord 2007, Detroit Tigers (f)utility infielder Neifi Perez filed for free agency. Expected suitors include junior varsity assistant coaching opportunities and/or becoming religious in order to try to save his soul that he sold to the devil.

The Tigers have now had two players suspended because of the new drug policy. Neifi Perez, and Alex "speedy" Sanchez. With these two suspensions, the Detroit Tigers lead all of Major League Baseball in irony.

Share your favorite true or untrue Neifi stories.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

remember that time we gave NP our used needles as we walked into CoPa...he told us it was just for his inciline but who would have thought? He is one tricky guy...

now the only question is, who is going to replace is positive locker room presence?

Brady Green said...

leyland wears spikes on gameday. That alone makes me not worried about the status of our locker room.

Anonymous said...

NP after getting 3 hits against the reds while playing for the cubs:
"It was a lucky day. Any time I get three hits it's a lucky game. I'm not a great hitter."
...no shit

Anonymous said...

YOU'RE BACK!

Brady Green said...

1. granderson
2. Polanco
3. Cabrera
4. Maggs
5. Sheff
6. Guillen
7. Renteria
8. Jones/Thames
9. Pudge

Verlander, Rogers, Bonderman, Willis, Robertson.

Anonymous said...

You can't blame neifi for getting suspended for stimulants, its tough to stay awake while sitting on the pine the whole game.